Accepting the truth..

"God has a reason for allowing things to happen. We may never understand his wisdom, but we simply have to trust his will."

Nagtanong ako kay Lord nung mga oras na nakaramdam ako ng sakit. Tinanong ko kung bakit nagkaganun, hindi ko ba nagampanan ng mabuti ang tungkulin ko? Hindi ba sapat yung pagmamahal na binibigay ko? Nagkukulang ba ako ng oras, pagmamahal? parang hindi naman kasi. Lahat naman ginagawa ko para dito, lahat ng pag-eexperiment sa ugali, sa pag-iintindi ng ugali, ginagawa ko kasi natatakot akong gawin sa kin ulit yun, natatakot akong mangyari. Pero without any sign, nangyayari na pala. Hindi man lang ako prepared. 

It's been the 3rd time. Akala ko pagod na ko. Oo, pagod na ako. Pero nadala pa din ako sa paulit-ulit niyang pagpilit sa akin to go back and be with him again. Kasi, kung may isang tao akong hindi matatanggihan sa lahat ng bagay, siya yun. Dati pa man, ganun na ako sa kanya. Akala ko tamang pagmamahal yung ganon. Akala ko enough na yun para masabi kong makukuntento na siya. Pero hindi pala. Pinipilit ko yung sarili kong hindi ko na siya mahal. Dapat wala na, kasi puno ng galit yung puso ko. pero hindi din e. 

Isang araw, napag-isipisip kong bigyan pa ng chance. This time, hindi na ako sigurado kung magbabago siya. Ang sigurado ako, masaya pa din ako pag kasama siya. Setting aside yung takot na konting kibot uulitin niya yun. Siguro ngayon, kailangan kong makuntento sa ganito. Yung parang pagmamahal na walang commitment. Yung hindi ka mag-eexpect ng kahit ano, hindi ka madidisappoint at hindi ka na magseselos, magagalit at kung ano-ano man. Magulo. Masalimuot. Pero baka sa ganitong paraan mabuhay ulit ang puso ko. Baka sa ganitong paraan, maniwala ulit ang puso at isip ko na magbabago siya. SANA. Makukuntento ako sa ganito kahit sa akin lang applicable to. Gagawin ko yung lahat para mabuhay ulit ang puso ko. 

Alam ko ngayon, pinipilit ng puso kong bumangon galing sa lusak habang patuloy akong nagdadasal na maging okay, na magbago nga siya ng tuluyan. Bumalik ang tawanan, masaya. Ayoko ng sirain yun. Ayoko ng isipin pa niya na hindi ako kuntento dun. Pero hindi ko palang makita ulit yung genuine happiness na dapat kong nakikita. Puno ng takot. Puno ng lahat ng galit sa tuwing maalala ko ang lahat. 

Sana nga panaginip nalang lahat. Pero ngayon, siguro hindi nalang ako titigil magmahal hanggang hindi ako namamatay, hanggang hindi namamatay ang puso ko. Pipiliin ko ng mamatay ng naramdaman kong sumaya kaysa naman yung isalba ang puso ko, at tigilang mag-saya. Bahala na si Lord. Baka yun yung message niya sa akin. Siya lang ang makakapagpasaya sa akin. Hindi ibang tao. Hindi dapat maging dependent ang kasiyahan ko sa ibang tao. 

// I understand. This is life. :./

May she rest in peace. :)

RT: "Minsan pinipili mo nalang manahimik at hindi kumibo para hindi na lumaki ang gulo."... 


--kaya dito ko nalang ilalabas lahat.haha. Para hindi na lang mag-away. :) 


Bothered for the nth time. Bakit pa kasi kailangang magkaroon ng connection. Sabi nga, it's either nakamove on na siya o umaasa pa rin siya sa kanya. I don't know, pero nabother ako ng bongga nung sinabi sa aking in-add daw siya ulit sa isang social networking site. I know it's nothing for him, pero for me, it's something big. I will not be like this kung walang nangyaring encounter between us. Siya ang naunang maging bitter. Hindi niya kasi matanggap na wala na, hindi niya kasi matanggap na he will never be hers again kahit anong mangyari. That's her loss, anyway. Baka hindi siya naging mabuting girlfriend for him. Sad to know that. She had her time, kaya tama na. Akala ko nakapag move on na ko sa close encounter namin pero hindi pa pala. Nanggigil pa rin ako sa galit sa tuwing naririnig ko ang pangalan niya. Wala naman akong ginawa sa kanya. Bitter lang siya. Ganda niya e. (oops. beware. Libelous to) haha:)) Im putting it into words, kasi mas madali kesa sa sabihin dahil mamimisinterpret lang kagad. Oo, ngayon bitter ako sa kanya. at kahit kailan magiging bitter ako sa kanya. tumigil siya, hindi ko siya makakasundo kahit kailan. Lumayo siya. Wag ng antaying iitulak ko siya palayo. 


She has intentions of adding him up again, I know. Whatever it is, may God Bless her. I already prayed for this. :'( Sana mas pinili niya na lang na manahimik at mawalan ng direct connection. tsk. 

Thankful, indeed! ♥

• "Be with a guy that is willing to spend Saturday night watching movies with you rather than being with his friends.” - The Notebook
  
  
  He has time for everything, and for everyone, but he never puts me in the least of his priorities.:) 
  
  
  Had a wonderful weekend with Benedict. Inspite of our busy schedules, thankful kasi nakakapagspend pa rin kami ng quality time together. Sa industriya kung nasaan kami, hindi madaling balansehin ang relationship. Hindi madaling magsurvive but the secrets are endless understanding, love, commitment and trust. Masarap yung pakiramdam na pag tinatanong mo siya kung mahal ka niya, hindi siya mapapagod sagutin na "opo, mahal kita"... Pero mas masarap yung pakiramdam na hindi mo na kailangang magtanong kasi hindi niya nakakalimutang ipakita, ipadama at sabihin na mahal ka niya, palagi, walang palya. 
  Naiintindihan ko bakit parang wala lang yung valentines day for him. Kasi dapat, everyday is love day.:) Everyday, magmamahal ka at mamahalin ka ng taong nangako ng pagmamahal na walang wakas:)
  
  
  
  
  "Lahat nababago liban sa pag-ibig ko                                                        
  kung ito'y di mo maramdaman, malamang ako'y patay na                                
  kaya wag kang mag-alala dahil hangga't may ako at ikaw,                        
  merong pag-ibig sa atin araw-araw. "  - Labbie 02.03.12

 I love you.:")

Random thoughts...

02.10.12. 

It has been a productive day for me. Slept at 7am and woke up at 12nn. Researched for story proposals tapos went outside to look for other story proposals and meet labbie. :) Minsan lang siya magkaroon ng off sa work kaya kailangang sulitin :-p 

Kanina, sa kalagitnaan ng paghahagilap ng storya sa lansangan, ito ang nasaksihan: Isang babae, sumugod sa asawa niya na nahuling may kalandian. Bad news,er? Nakakagulat lang talaga. Siguro nasa 40's na ang edad nilang lahat. Hindi lang makakaila na sobrang masakit para sa babae ang mahuli niya ng ganun ang asawa niyang hitad. haha:) Madami ng tao ang may infidelity issues, I just wish they have conscience para maisip na hindi na makatarungan ang ginagawa nila. Nagpplayback lang sa utak ko yung line nung babae, "Hindi ka na nahiya, hindi mo inisip na may asawa ka."... Poor woman, I pitied her a lot. Sana she'll get over this kaagad. What's worse is that hindi nagsasalita yung lalake. (ang sarap saksakin..haha)

This will be for all the men out there who were still a big pain in the ass of their girls.  Men, please be considerate. Make sure that when you ask for a girl's heart, it SHOULD BE ONLY just her. No ifs, buts and flirting things. I really don't believe in the saying na loyal boys are those who flirt all day but at the end of the day, they will always go back to where their heart belongs. Why be loyal when you can be the faithful one? I just feel bad for girls na sobrang paranoid dahil sa mga ganitong issues. They just can't help but think over and over again what are their boys doing, or where are they staying... 

And girls, keep your eyes and minds open.:) Know your limitations and know where to stop.  But, once you decide to stay again and forgive, make sure to give your 100% best to trust and be whole again. It will be really difficult to stay in a relationship without trust and more love from the both of you. It will be the best feeling when you know you have survived this kind of trial. 

Serious thoughts ha?:) haha. Based from experiences, who cannot give words of wisdom like these?:-p At least, I've learned and I have forgiven. Anyway, I still can't find the suitable story to propose for next week's airing. God help me.:) 

Tomorrow will be our high school alumni homecoming. :) Got a message from my super favorite teacher na she will be coming daw.:"> 

Labbie and the rest of the gang will be going to Mindoro on Monday til Thursday. Sad thing, I can't be with him on those dates:( Sh*t airing week.:/ 

ang gulo mo lang LOVE...- 25th month:)

Dati, kapag naririnig ko yung mga ganitong kataga, I'll just turn my back and say, "wooo, parang hindi naman" Basta ang alam ko, may mga dadating na trials, quarrels and everything pero not as worse as this. At ngayon ko narealize na ang pag-ibig pala parang buhay din-- masaya, madugo at palakasan.. Hindi ka pwedeng lalampa-lampa dito. Salamat sa taong nagparealize sa akin ng ganito. 


Isa sa mga salitang pinakamahirap i-define ay ang pag-ibig. Mahirap talaga. Dati sabi ko, alam mo na ang totoong meaning ng love kapag nakapagsakripisyo ka, naging masaya ka at minahal mo ng buong makakaya mo yung taong yun. Pero hindi.  Dapat mas malalalim sa mga yun ang pang-unawa mo sa pagmamahal. Natutunan ko na hindi dapat puro saya. Mas magiging matamis kung may paghihirap at sakit kasi dun mo mas lalong ma-appreciate ang kagandahan ng buhay. 


For the past 19 years of my life, I experienced happiness, hurt at lahat ng emotion na pwede mong maranasan. I can proudly say that truly, "Life is not perfect and there is no one perfect". Pero, above all that, "Patience is the only virtue". I know and I believe na malalagpasan ko din ang lahat:) 


Dun na din papasok ang pagmamahal na tinuro ni God.Sabi sa Bible, si Lord daw tinuruan tayo magmahal unconditionally. Kahit gaano kasakit ang ginawa sayo ng tao, you should love like how God loved us. Mahirap. Madugo. Pero kung determinado ka, keri lang. Wag ka lang papadala sa pagod kasi yun yung magpapatalo sayo. Basta dapat marunong ka lang makipagsabayan sa buhay, hindi lahat kasi ng bagay maayon sa gusto mo. :) 


Masaya magkaron ng lahat. Maayos na pamilya, magandang career, magandang love life at maayos na mga kaibigan. Pero expect the worst na may papalpak at papalpak jan sa mga yan. You'll never have all of those at the same time. Bawal favoritism kay Lord:)


Pag may tiwalang nawala, mejo mahihirapan kang maibalik. swerte ka kung ginagawa niya lahat to bring back that trust. Madadapa minsan, mauulit ang mali pero babangon at babangon para makuha ang inaasam na tagumpay. Sana ganun kadali tanggapin ang lahat. Sana may re-charge button ang buong pagkatao mo para kapag pagod ka na, pindutin mo lang yun at lalakas ka ulit. 


Sa dinami-dami ng tao sa mundo, minsan iisipin mo bakit sya. Bakit paulit-ulit kang nagpapatawad. Kahit gaano katanga na ang tingin sayo ng ibang tao, go ka pa din. Sabi ko, pinagdasal ko na to kay Lord at mukhang ayaw niya pang iwanan ko. Baka nga. Baka kasi may plan sya. Dun ako naghohold on. Minsan, when you go back to where you started, maiisip mo talaga na hindi ka makakahanap ng tulad niya. Perfect na sana. Pero wala ngang perpekto kaya wag na masyadong demanding. haha. 


For the past2 years, masaya ako, sobra.. Dito ko naramdaman ang mga pinapangarap ko for an ideal relationship. Yung tipong makakasama mo sa isang trip, mag-aalaga sayo at hindi matutulog kapag may sakit ka, kasama mo through thick and thin sa lahat, sa bagyo, sa hirap, sa lahat, at yung taong hindi maggiveup kahit gano ka kahirap intindihin. Lahat ng pinapangarap ng isang babae para sa ideal relationship, nandito. except for one thing. Yun ang flaw. pero minsan dapat mong tiisin hanggang alam mong pinipilit niyang baguhin para sayo. :)


I may not be the best, the prettiest and the sexiest, pero lahat naman gagawin para sa kanya.:) Siguro yun ang lamang ko sa kanila. Kahit hanapin pa nya  ang tulad ko sa mga libro, pelikula, mga social networking sites at kahit san,  hindi nya pa rin mahahanap ang R.A na meron sya. 




- 25th:) ♥♥♥

Enhancing relationships:)

TRUST is a very important factor for all relationships. When trust is  broken, it is the end of the relationship. Lack of trust leads to   suspicion, suspicion generates anger, anger causes enmity and enmity   may result in separation. 


Once a trust is broken, as he find a way to earn this again, let yourself find a way to bring back that trust again. Meet halfway.:)





NO POINTING FINGERS 



We all look forward to being loved and respected. Many people are afraid of losing face. Generally, when a person makes a mistake, he would look around to find a scapegoat to point the finger at. This is the start of a war. We should always remember that when we point one finger at a person, the other four fingers are pointing at ourselves.

If we forgive the others, others will ignore our mistake too.  "Never criticize your wife for her shortcomings or when she does something wrong. Always bear in mind that because of her shortcomings and weaknesses, she could not find a better husband than you."


FORGIVE... and ACCEPT.. Those are the keys...




CREATING PERFECT RELATIONSHIPS? 


There is a saying that a perfect match can only be found between a blind wife and a deaf husband ,because the blind wife cannot see the faults of the husband and the deaf husband cannot hear the nagging of the wife. Many couples are blind and deaf at the courting stage and dream of perpetual perfect relationship. Unfortunately, when the excitement of love wears off, they wake up and discover that marriage is not a bed of roses. The nightmare begins. 


There will never be a perfect relationship. If we want to make things come our way, that's selfishness. We have to understand each other's flaws.. We are here to make our imperfect partner PERFECT. 


NO OVERPOWERING 

Many relationships fail because one party tries to overpower another,or demands too much. People in love tend to think that love will conquer all and their spouses will change the bad habits after marriage. Actually, this is not the case. There is a Chinese saying which carries the meaning that "It is easier to reshape a mountain or a river than a person's character." 




I've learned that you can never change a person no matter you want him to. It must be his will. It must be his choice. It will never be yours.. Let him and everything will fall in it's right places. 


R IGHT SPEECH 

There is a Chinese saying which carries the meaning that "A speech will either prosper or ruin a nation." Many relationships break off because of wrong speech. When a couple is too close with each other,we always forget mutual respect and courtesy. We may say anything without considering if it would hurt the other party. 


As what was said, communication is irreversible. Be careful with what you say. It might change your life forever..


P ERSONAL PERCEPTION 

Different people have different perception. One man's meat could be another man's poison.do not be too bothered by others words if our conscience is clear. 


Just follow your heart and mind and pray..:) everything will be alright.


BE PATIENT 


People make mistakes. We are allowed to make mistakes. But the actions we take while in a rage will haunt us forever. 


Learn to forgive and forget.. I know, it will not be too easy.. Yes, it's very hard. But it's for the both of you..






Too much of everything is bad. Learn to live in moderation. Love moderately. Know your limitations. Warning: Love is dangerous. But try it, and you'll feel the best feeling ever.:)




*in bold letters: personal notes:)

for a smooth flow of relationship (reposted)

10 things you should not say in a relationship.

1. “You’re over-reacting.”While this may be true from an objective standpoint, she will never agree, at least not on the spot. No matter what she may be throwing at you, be that insults or ceramic knick-knacks, she believes she’s acting appropriately. So duck if you have to and then say something like this: “I don’t blame you for being upset, but I’d rather focus our energy on fixing the problem.”
2. “You’re not being logical.”Once again, you may be right, but that’s beside the point.  (Note that we said “may.”) When in the midst of a debate, one plus one can equal three. Put logic aside, and listen for the core matter as she sees it. Hopefully she’ll return the favor when you suggest, for instance, that because it’s the third Sunday of the month, it would be a crime against humanity if you didn’t go fishing.
3. “Who put that idea in your head, your mother?” On a calm day, your wife or main squeeze may concur that her mother is a bit “out there.” However, when you suggest that some beef or ideas of hers isn’t genuine and, instead, has been “planted” by her mother (or sister, or girlfriend), it suggests that she can’t think for herself. Treat her thoughts and ideas as her own, regardless of their origin.
4. “That’s the dumbest thing I’ve ever heard.”Well, maybe you need to read more, because whenever you feel you’ve heard the worst of ideas, just sample a few pages of the Darwin Awards. Don’t dismiss ideas outright. Instead, express what about the idea you don’t like. Even better, start by saying what you do like about the idea. Remember, someone once called the internal combustion engine a waste of gray matter.
5. “The other guys’ wives are cool with it.”Even if true, such statements really shouldn’t matter. Think about it this way: If your kid wanted to do something that you didn’t want him to, would the fact that another parent told his kid it was OK change your mind? We didn’t think so. What other wives or girlfriends are doing or saying should be of no concern. Make decisions for yourselves and leave others out of it. Or risk your wife telling you all about the “super-duper romantic” dinner some other husband put together for some other wife.
6. “After everything that I’ve done for you?!”This is playing the guilt card, which may work now and then, but at a steep cost. It suggests that, at the end of the day, your relationship is one based on points reflecting who’s done what for whom. And you might want to reflect long and hard before you suggest that such a score be tallied.
7. “You’ll feel differently tomorrow.”Maybe. Maybe not. Often, a good night’s rest provides a different perspective on life, right? And though this insight may be wise, none of us like to hear it. That’s because it suggests that something we’re upset, angry or passionate about now is just a passing fancy.
8. “You always (fill in the blank).” “You never (fill in the blank).”Definitive statements like these only poke the bear. In most of these cases ¾ “You never give me credit for what I do!” ¾ they’re not literally true and only come off as grandiose statements that hide the real concern or message. Talk, instead, in terms of “sometimes” and “only occasionally.” You’re more apt to be heard, even if you feel that never happens.
9. “You didn’t used to be this way.”Inherent in this statement is the implication that in whatever manner you suggest she “used to be,” that that was far better than the way she is now. Ouch!
10. “You’re missing the point.”When your wife hears this, it gets translated into “You’re not smart enough to understand what I obviously said so clearly and so brilliantly, so let me dumb it down for you.” If you really think she missed your point, then make your point again in a different way.

I'm indeed lucky:) ♥

Maswerte ka kung meron kang boyfriend na:

• Hinahatid ka sa sakayan mo pauwi. Kasi ayaw niyang mapahamak ka. Kung pwede nga lang, ihatid ka niya sa bahay niyo para sigurado.
• Handa kang ipaglaban sa mga taong hahadlang sa inyo. Yun bang “you and me against the world ang dating.”
• Ipapakilala ka sa pamilya niya. Sweet yun kasi kapag pinakilala ka niya, para na rin niyang sinabi na gusto ka niyang makasama at makasundo mo ang family niya dahil mahal na mahal ka niya.
• Hahawakan ang kamay mo kahit pasmado. Hindi siya choosy. Basta importante, mahawakan niya ang kamay mo.
• Magbabayad ng pamasahe mo kahit ayaw mo. Normal daw kasi sa lalaking magprovide. At nakakatapak ng ego kapag tinanggihan mo.
• Kapag natatakpan ng buhok mo ang mukha mo, hahawiin niya.Kasi gusto niyang makita ng maayos ang mukha mo.
• Yayakapin ka pag umiyak ka. Para tumahan ka na at malaman mong safe ka na.
• Kasasakay mo pa lang ng jeep/tricycle, itetext ka na ng “ingat ka” Just to make you smile.
• Aasarin ka, tapos pag naasar ka na, sasabihing “ang cute mo.” Trip lang. Pero sweet pa rin.
• Magtetext ng unexpected “I LOVE YOU”. Para lang maalala mong may nagmamahal sayong tulad niya.
• Tatawagan ka kahit hindi siya naka-unli call para lang kamustahin ka o i-update ka sa mga ginagawa niya. Para hindi ka magduda sa kanya.
• Proud na ilagay sa Facebook na IN A RELATIONSHIP siya sayo.Para malaman ng mga dati niyang friends ang tungkol sa inyo.
• Magpopost sa Wall mo ng mga sweet messages. Para pagbukas mo ng FB mo, pangalan agad niya ang makikita mo.
• Ginawa niyang wallpaper ang picture mo. Para araw araw pagbukas niya ng cellphone niya, ikaw agad ang maaalala niya

Reposted:) 

There's more than those which makes me feel so lucky to have him:) ♥♥♥

I feel so loved:)

"Ang tunay na lalaki, nag-aalala kapag hindi nagtetext ang girlfriend niya. Di bale ng maging makulit, malaman lang niya ang safety niya.":) 


Natuwa lang ako dito sa post from tumblr.:) I just remembered how labbie cared for me nung mga times na umuuwi ako ng madaling araw galing sa malayong lugar:)). I just realized kung paano siya nagcacare nung hindi pa ako nagtetext sa kanya at pag-uwi ko pa lang nasagot tawag niya na umiiyak pa.:) (sorry labbie:* )  Wala lang.:) simple things that make me feel so loved:'> Thank you benedict:) Gusto ko lang ipaalam sa kanila na naaalagaan ako ng maayos ng taong mahal ko.:) (CHEESY POTEK) hahahaha:))


I love you:)

chakas♥

""Friendship is not about whom you have known the longest,who came first in ur life or who cares the best. Its all about who came & never left."

I love you girls. Thank you. We've been classmates for four years pero I got to know all of you just a year ago. Alam niyo naman lahat ng nangyari at thank you for the warm welcome sa group.:) at dahil jan iisa-isahin ko kayo..:))(Alphabetically arranged):)) hahaha

Phem: Baaabe:) Thank you.. Hindi ko matandaan pano tayo naging close pero ang alam ko lang, nacucutean ako sayooo dati:) hahaha.. (tomboy) haha. joke lang. Mejo nag-umpisa sa New yorker ung kacute-an mo e:) mang roger the best.. tapos hanggang naging totoong babae ka na tracy turnblad:) (oh I know Tracy Turnblad! good for you girl you got on the show!- lil Inez) hanggang nabuo ang tropang san andres:) at hanggang ngayon, eto pa din.:) Isa sa mga taong pinagkakatiwalaan ko. sobra. alam mo na ung mga panahong yun..Thank you sa lahat babe at sa negosyo nating kape:)) haha.. ipagpatuloy natin habang unemployed pa tayo.. malapit lang naman ang bahay natin sa isa't isa:) tumblingan nalang:)  Thank you sobra. mamimiss ko ang pagsabay natin papasok ng school, ang pang-paparanoid sa akin at lahat ng ka-everan:)) haha..Basta babe, no matter what, always remember that happiness is a choice. I know that's one of the lessons you've learned.  Thank you. I LOVE YOU JENEFER BALGOA:)

Karen: Tropang Karen:)) Thank you walang sawang pagpapayo. alam ko kahit yung iba pa-joke pero I know, it's for me. Natatandaan ko we became close nung college algebra days.:) seatmate e at walang ginawa kundi tumawa at magchismisan:) I'll miss that.:) Shet tropang karen mamimiss kita.. pag pauwi, hindi pa dapat magbayad sa jeep pagkasakay. dapat, pagdating palang ng St. Anthony. :)) Hindi ko maintindhan bakit dapat ganon. hahaha:)) Naging rule lang un sa tropang san andres. hahaha:)) Ang ngiti mong nakakamatay, at hindi nagbabago, ipagpatuloy mo lang yan:) at alam kong uunlad ang career mo dahil sa exposure mo sa soco. I'm such a proud friend:) haha. thank you tropang karen:) Stay in love:) at wag masaydong maikli pasensya.:)) at please pakibagalan ng onti ang pagsasalita:)) hahaha.. Thank you.. I LOVE YOU KAREN CAMBRONERO:)

Cess: Munk:) I have known you since audition ng verge:) bangis mo e:) dun mo ko napasaya e:) hanggang naging classmates tayo..:) tapos walang katapusang batian sa class. at syempre kulitan.:) minsan wag maging seryoso masyado aa?:) Mahal ka ng mga tao sa paligid mo. trust them:) nalulungkot lang ako na wala ng tatawag sa kin ng "chip" pag nakita ako naglalakad kahit saan. kasi alam ko dun ka na sa pampanga.. pwede ka pa magbago ng isip.. please:) haha.. Kahit saan man tayo makarating, just always remember the people around you.. They love you. Dito lang ako anytime,:) I LOVE YOU PRINCESS RIO CANLAS:)

Rachel: Ang taong pag nagsalita, tagos sa puso:)) hahaha.. I can't forget yung mga sinabi mo sa akin nung time na umiyak ako datii.. alam mo na yun. iba ang tama sa puso ko ee. haha.. Feeling ko una at huling bonding natin yung nung monday:) hahaha.. Pero i'm glad na meron syempre.:) diba? haha. thank you rachel.:) Always stay happy:) I LOVE YOU RACHEL CORTEZ:)

Riya: _ _ _ _ _ mate!:) haha. bawal buuin magagalit si randy.:) well, may ever-kulit at daldal na seatmate..:) Pag alpahabetical order ang seating arrangement, ay lagot na..:)) haha.:) Ang sobrang memories natin nung summer 2010 ee. Customer Relations at French:) Ang pareho nating pagiging bingi at pangungulit kay madame gigi.:) Pag sa french, dapat ready pag sa exams at quizzes:) jan ang bonding moments natin e:) haha. :) Sabi ko nga kay rachel, ang last bonding ata ntin ay nung monday.:) lalo na tayo na naiwan lang:)) haha.. thank you _ _ _ _ _ mate:) sooobra.. mamimiss kitaaa.. I LOVE YOU ROSARIO DE GUZMAN:)

Ahr: We were not given the chance to know each other well pero thankful ako kasi sa short time na yun, naging mabuti kang friend.:) Thank you ahr.:) Thank you sa mga advice mo sa akin nung mga panahong nasaktan ako.:) feeling ko ung mga advice na un, dapat mo ding iapply sayo.:)) love you! hahaha:* Ingat ka jan palagi ahr:) bumalik ka din dito para masaya..:) miss you..:) I LOVE YOU SARAH JANE FRONDA:)

Jo: omaigaaad:) my dearest tombots:) hahaha.. feeling ko andami2 na nating pinagdaanan sobra.. feeling ko mga 25 years na tayong friends:)) hahaha.. Naalala ko we became first friends nung first day of classes. sabi ko pa noon, shet may friend ako kamuka ni kyla.:)) ngayon pag iniisip ko eew nalang:)) hahaha.. :* hindi tayo magkasection first sem kaya hanggang first day lang ang pagiging friends:)) haha.. ayon. pinagtagpo ulit landas natin nung envi sci:) haha.. feeling ko ang hinhin mo! sobra. ewaan, pag nga naman binbiro ka ng tadhana o. ahahaa:)) tapos aun hanggang batian sa corridors at class. tapos hanggang hairspray. Na itinuring na tatay ni inez:) haha.. may pagkamalandi kasi si mudrabel ko hindi ko alam sino tatay namin e:)) haha.. inangkin mo nalang.. nasanay talaga ko na dadi tawag sayo. tomboy ka kasi talaga ee.:) tapos hanggang mabuo ang bells family at unti2 ng nageevolve ang tawagan natin. ikaw na si baby dear:) haha.. summer 2010 din un nung naging close tayo.:) hindi ko alam panu nagumpisa pero bsta bigla kitang tinuksong tomboi:) yan na tawag ko sayo.:) hanggang ikaw din at tumira ka na sa amin. ang usapan ilang days lang:) at tumagal ng hanggng first sem ng 4th year.:) Well, lahat ng nangyri, i know plan ni Lord yun.:) Kasi we're like sisters now:) ung iba kong ssbhn sa mahabng letter nalang.:) 

Thank you tombot:) I LOVE YOU JOANNA MARIE LUNA:)

Niña: Kapaatid:) graaabe..isa pa sa mga taong sobrang pinagkakatiwalaan ko, sobra sobra ang utang na loob ko sayo.:)) haha.. naalala ko lang dati nung sembreak, theater days pa.. wala lang:) grabe kuya talaga kita e:) You will always be my one and only poging kuya seaweed:) hahaha:) Thankful ako kase nagkaron ako ng katulad mo, dream ko ang magkaron ng kuya ee and you fulfilled it:) hahaa:* babaw ng pangarap e:)) pano nga tayo naging close? Una dahil sa verge:) pero hindi pa sobrang close. Hairspray talaga umpisa e. hanggang sepulturero ng tsp at nagtuloy-tuloy naa.:) Naalala kong nakapagsinungaling ako kay bene para  lang samahan ka uminom at damayan ka sa kalungkutan mo.:) alam ko na ang tungkulin ko dati palang. halakhak na ko tlga e:)) hahaha.. Naalala ko tandem with reg e:) nakakatawa kayo e kung makaipit sa akin nung nagkaconflict kayo.:) ibang klase.. hahaha:* pero masaya ako sa mga panahong yun.:) Thank you kuya:) sobraaaaaa..:* I LOVE YOU NIÑA MAE MENDIOLA:)

Dea: hahaa:) classmates since first sem first year:) iba bangis mo nun dea ee:)) hahaa.:* alalahanin mo matatawa ka:)) Thankful ako kasi  nakakabiruan kita and I get to know you well:) hahaha:) Pagdating sa real world, wag na pikon masyado aaa? mahrap na at hindi pa natin sila kakilala masyado.. Ingatan mabuti si "kevin" hahaha:)) mamimiss kita:) Thank you palagi dea..:) I LOVE YOU ANDREA LOUISE NICOLAS:)

Mitch: mudrabeeel:) haha.. naalala ko nung earlier years plang, mejo natatarayan ako sayo. taray e! kainis:)) haha. hindi nagpapatalo. Syempre ang formation ng friendship ay nung hairspray days:) Dahil mahal kitang inay, mahal nga talaga kita(ano?) hahaha:)) thank you mudrabel:) Always choose to be happy okay? Hindi ko talaga malimutan ung umiinom ka one-on-one with mucho. hahaa:)) ibang klase sa inuman ee:)) antatag:)) hahahaha:* "baby, kiss your mom"- mitch. "ha? i dont call my mother, mom. I call her mudrabel"-r.a... Kinausap ako ng lasing. ayaaan:)) hahaha. thank you mudrabel. I ll miss youuu:* I LOVE YOU MICHELLE JOY PATINGO:)

Joyce: Cinnamon:) haha.. Like tombot, we became first friends nung first day ng classes.:) aun. hanggang dun lang ulit. tapos hnggang naging classmates:) naging close nung summer 2010:) tapos nung media mgt natin na sobrang nakapagbond tayo:) haggang nakatulog kami ni tombot sa inyo:) graabe:) ambilis lang ng panahon.:) I admire you cinnamon. You don't brag pero you're good in everything you do.:) I know you'll do good in the real world. Thank you cinnamon..:) I'll miss your kaingayan ever:) I LOVE YOU JOYCE LYNN VILLAREAL:)

"You can count on me like one, two, three, I'll be there and I know when I need it
I can count on you like four, three, two ,And you'll be there 'cause that's what friends
Are supposed to do.."   I'll miss you girls:) see you again.:) 

TSP♥

        Di ko lam pano uumpisahan pero thankful ako kasi andito ako sa pamilya na masarap mahalin. Eversince I started college, I never thought na mapupunta ko sa ganitong org. It never crossed my mind. Basta ang akin, tumangkilik at humanga sa bawat myembro ng Tanghalang St. Paul. After one and a half year, I can say na sobra akong naging masaya dito. Thankful ako kasi napasali ako at hindi ko makakalimutan lahat ng pinagdaanan ko dito.


          I was just an audience that time. haha:)) supporter lang ako ni benedict para sa minor play ng feb 2010. Then, Momi Ishie, the director,asked me and niña kung pwede kaming maging dancers/angels for the play.. Onti lang exposure nun pero go kami kasi we're not after the exposure naman. haha:))  Mas lumawak ang pamilya dahil nadagdagan kami ng maraming-marami. Workshops, team building, sobra2ng memories ang iniwan sa puso ko nun.Until Sepulturero jr. came.:) Kahit from ojt, pupunta ng school for the rehearsal.:) May improvement sa role in fairness:) Angels pa din kami pero madami ng exposure(as in super dami) with colorful wigs(aww) haha:)) One of the unforgettable moments sa buhay ko sa tsp. After ilang months, major play naman.:) Last production of the seniors.Re-staging of Alipin ng Aliw. Well, unexpected yung role ko.(hahahahaha) Hindi naman kasi ako palatawa masyado tas yung role ko si HALAKHAK.:) (o may magrereact) hhahaha:))) 


       After the major play, I therefore conclude na kaya kong gawin ang mga bagay na imposible para sakn dati, basta lang may determination at pagmamahal sa trabaho.:) Madami akong natutunan sa tsp:) Hindi lang kapal ng muka ang idinulot sa akin nito pero pati ang value ng mga tao sa paligid ko naituro sa akin.:) 


    Thank you sa lahat ng members, sa mga nakasama ko sa sepulturero sr.(Reg, cusi, mitch, angge, pierre,abby,jom,niña with ate sam and momi ishie), Sepulturero Jr.(Nathan,joy,kaye,jimmy,eunick, coycoy, jeremy, ena, mish, niña with abby, golDA and Momi Ishie), and Alipin ng Aliw(Momi Ishie, golDA, Jo, Niña, labbie, mitch, jimmy,denden,roxy,mish,aries, ranniel,josam, jeremy,lor,jom, neil,chesley,baby jessey, shiela, mel, eme, nyssa, mariel, abby, dj, joy, reg,maxene,kaye, drea,reg racho, pabo, jc, marie, Lorainne, pierre, abby lantano, blanche, valerie, coycoy, nette, ezra, kevin and of course our director, Ate R) buong tsp, super thank you.. 


Let's see again tsp family:) I love you everyone.:)

♥♥♥

• Let’s grow old together… beginning with today. 
• Let’s work slowly with each other and build a relationship that we can both enjoy being a part of. 
• Let’s share love and understand that neither of us is perfect; we are both subject to human frailties. 
• Let’s hold each other close and whisper though the night—pledging our love, honoring our commitment. 
• Let’s encourage each other to pursue our dreams, even when we’re weary from trying. 
• Let’s expect the best that we both have to give and still love when we fall short of our expectations. 
• Let’s be friends and respect each other’s individual personality and give one another room to grow. 
• Let’s be candid with each other and point out strengths and weaknesses. 
• Let’s understand each other’s personal philosophy, even if we don’t agree. 
• Let’s lie awake long into the night sharing our innermost secrets. 
• Let’s be friends as well as lovers. 
• Let’s laugh at time and plan with each other and wonder how we ever got along without this love we’ve found. 
• Let’s never take for granted these moments that we’ve shared, but always be reminded of how intensely we have learned to live, how completely we have learned to love. 
• Let’s grow old together… and look back on life and smile.

(reposted from tumblr)

Reposted..:)♥♥♥

1. How to Keep Your Girlfriend Happy ♥

   
   

   Maintain. If you did a bunch of cute things with her before, try & keep it up. You don’t have to go all out everyday for her, but don’t stop completely just because you got her already.

   
   

   “Ladies first.” No. That rule doesn’t apply to communication. Don’t wait for her call, text, IM, why don’t you try talking to her first for a change ? It’s thoughtful & sweet if a guy can actually do that.

   
   

   Surprise her. You don’t have to drive an hour to her house at 3 a.m. to set off her name in fireworks in front of her window, but the little things are big things. A simple, good morning text, is more powerful than you think.

   
   

   What insecurities ? For the love of God, all girls have insecurities. Please don’t point them out. For example, today I was looking at food & my boyfriend said “You eat a lot. You probably could beat me at a buffet.” WHAT. THAT’S NOT WHAT YOU SAY. Also, let her be herself. If she’s having a bad hair day, don’t make fun of her if it’s hurtful. Let her wear sweatpants & still feel pretty damn cute around you, even when she’s not looking her best.

   
   

   Act the same around your friends. You’re not a real man if you completely blow off your girl in front of your homeboys. When you’re going to hang out with her & your friends you better not run off & leave her standing there to greet them like WUDDUPPP GUYSSS.. NO, you better at least walk with her & introduce her to them if you haven’t already. If you walk with her hand in hand, she’ll love it.

   
   

   When she’s mad. Dude, you better try & get her back. Chase her, whatever it is, don’t let her walk away when she’s mad at you. It shows you don’t care enough to go after her. Don’t let her go.

   
   

   One & Only. If your girl really doesn't like one of your friends, trust, she has good reason to. Girls’ intuition -shrug- So don’t go hanging with your home girl all the time if you know your girlfriend doesn’t likethat bitch. She usually won’t hate for no reason. Respect her. 
   
   
   Trust. Honesty. If you lie to her, you’re going to have one hell of a time regaining that trust because she’ll start questioning everything you’ve said or done for her, no matter how small that lie was. Fess up or get lost.
   
   
   Love her. That’s all. :)♥
   
   
   SPREAD THE LOVE♥
   

   
   

The best love:).. our story plus our all-time favorite songs:) ♥

487 days of laughter and tears.. 1 year, and 4 months of  love and happiness. It's been a long time since we've started this relationship but it feels like it's always the first day:) We've been through a lot of trials but all I can say is that this will be the best love I'll ever have:)


September 25, 2009:) my best love story has started. This chapter in my life marks the end of something but starts another new and more beautiful things. Those moments when I'm on my worst because of the different trials surrounding me, but thankful for giving him to me, to be my source of strength. Even now, while reminiscing  those times, I would just smile and say thank you for giving me strengths during my worst moments.


OKAY.. syempre pag nabasa na naman to ni benedict, sasabihin na naman pwede naman ako magtagalog ee : p haha..


A rollercoaster-ride..:) Una palang sobrang dami na ang may ayaw. Pero marami pa din ang natuwa,naexcite at sumoporta. Pero all these people became reasons why we became stronger and closer. There were times kasi when he'll just sit in front of me and sing a song while my tears fall. 
*WITH A SMILE AND WAG KANG MATAKOT by Eraserheads* 
<Girl I'll stay through the bad times                <Wag kang matakot
Even if I have to fetch you everyday                 Di mo ba alam andito lang ako
I'll get by if you smile                                     sa iyong tabi
You can never be too happy in this life>          di kita pababayaan kailanman>

Walang araw na hindi ako tatawa kahit puno ng problema utak ko.:) 

He even composed an original song for me..:)) Here's how it goes:

I don’t care about anyone                  They say we're not meant to be

I don’t care about what they say        Just hold my hands let's make this possible

‘cause you’re my only one                 to defy all the odds

I don’t care about anything                 to conquer it all, to conquer it all

‘cause as long as you’re here                                       

You’re my everything                         I know you've been through a lot

And I want you to hear,                      I know you want to give up

I say I love you,                                 Just always remember I'm by your side

This I really do,                                 Just close your eyes and hold me tight                                             

This is my surrender to you               and everything will be alright.

Say you love me too 

Say like you really do

This is all I want to hear from you

The best comfort during those times..:)

Time flies so fast, normal adjustments,and changes which were really part of growing up in a relationship. May mga bagay na hindi pinapakita or ginagawa dati, pero slowly lumalabas at nakikita. Meron din naman na nawawala which I thought at first is that he is gradually changing his treatment. But no, he's not. Dun sa bagay na yun, learning took place. Kahit ang mga salitang nanggaling sa kanya na, HINDI NAGBABAGO ANG PAGMAMAHAL KAHIT KELAN AT KAHIT GAANO KATAGAL PA YAN. NAG-IIMPROVE LANG.  ♥

I would never forget what he said. Siguro dahil may proof ako and i'm thankful for that.  

I was able to do things na hindi ko na naman ginagawa dati. Like, joining a fun run, even ang pagkain ng monggo at dinuguan at pati tahong (buti nga ampalaya hindi naisipang ipakain sa akin e) haha..:)) More than those, even being interested in playing musical instruments and the idea of bands ay dahil sa kanya:)) *There's just something sa idea of doing things together. Masarap sa feeling..:) 

May mga small details, small things na nagagawa namin together during our free time. Like playing tekken, guitar hero, mga tipong simpleng laughtrips, mga ilang oras ng kwentuhan, bonding,  even yung tutugtugan nya ako habang sasayaw ako:)) at ang mga guitar lessons nya sakin, at dancing lessons ko sa kanya.:) ♥


Pati sa pagpupuyat kasabay ko..I can still remember before, I was the scriptwriter of our radio drama. I did the script until 5am and sya din hindi natulog to give me ideas for the script.:) Everytime na may gagawin, he's always there. Kung pwedeng siya na ang gumawa for me, he will. Lahat ng possible ways of helping, iooffer niya.:) Speaking of those efforts, I remembered when he will wait for 5-6 hours para lang sabay kami:)  Theater rehearsals na kahit wala syang pasok, pupunta sa school, mag-aantay ng ilang oras para sunduin ako.:) simple things, which really make my heart melt. ♥

After everything that we have gone through, we're still standing strong, and thankful for having the opportunity to spend our first anniversary together. With the help of friends, feeling ko successful naman yung surprise ko.:) haha.. *25 reasons why I love him in 25 strips of paper distributed to the people na makakasalubong, makakasama or madadaanan niya papunta sa akin*, *Illustration board where elmo, his fave character, was drawn with lots of messages from our friends(credits to joanna marie:)) and *a sketch of our own picture (by Myrwen, haha) *Celebrated with Joanna marie and Byron, we all had a very wonderful and meaningful celebration. Kahit simple lang, pero sobrang nadama.  ♥

Hindi lahat ng ikukuwento ko dito ay masaya at ikatutuwa. haha:)) pero may mga  pangyayari na nakapagpabago, at dahil dito may nawala pero may nanatili at di kailanman mawawala. Mga nakapagpatunay na hindi nalulutas ng isang hug ang sakit, not like before. No need to mention kung ano man yun, our friends already knew that. Pero, this is just a proof that not all relationship should be happy all the time. Mas healthy kung may trials, kasi yun ung nakakapagpastrong. We've reached the point where "we are so close still so far" but we have to "start all over again" since we have decided to fix things for the both of us as a couple and as individuals as well. 


I know I'm in good hands. Because when God knows that you're ready for the responsibility of commitment, He'll reveal the right person under the right circumstances. ♥


I can still remember, during the time when I said "yes" to him, nagtanong kagad sya kung nakikita ko ba daw na sya ang kasama ko sa future. Mahirap sagutin yun nung mga panahong yun. hello?:)) kakasagot lang?:)) excited?? hahaha.. pero as time passed by, I can say that he is the person that I want to spend the rest of my life with, Kahit Maputi na ang buhok ko. ♥


I love you ♥